How to "find your purpose" in 3 Steps
(note, these are not 3 easy steps):
1) "Know thyself" & "To thine own self be true" (Socrates & Shakespeare respectively)
This is largely an individual exercise, but can be augmented by close trusted friends such as a spouse. Depending on how busy your life is, this step might have two phases: A) get out of the noise/distractions of your current life and rest and be for a while, then phase B) listen, ask and answer the questions.
The questions you might ask (be honest with yourself and write em down, there are no wrong answers when brainstorming):
- What do I like to do?
- When am I most happy?
- What am I most passionate about?
- Why am I here? What does the world need, my community need, my neighbor need?
- When I'm dead, what do I want people to remember?
So once you've answered these questions (with time, patience & honesty), move on to step 2...
2) Know God You can (and should) bounce back and forth between steps 1 & 2 (or combine them if you'd like).
Away from the noise/distractions of your current life, get to know God, seek Him, listen and read the Bible.
We are each fearfully and wonderfully made. God has made us unique in our personalities, skills, passions & interests so who better to consult with than your creator? What did You make me for anyway?!?!
Listen, ask and answer questions. Take your brainstormed list from step 1 and refine it, prioritize it, look at it with your maker, add to it, subtract from it (but keep your notes, for step 3).
One of my favorite teachings is on this (all 3 steps) is from Church of the Highlands: "I am a minister"
He made you expressly for purposes that He lined up in advance (Eph 2:10). He didn't make you and then size you up and think to Himself, "hmmmm, what do you suppose we could do with this one?" but rather the other way around. :)
A few verses to ponder: Eph 2:10, Ex 9:16, Job 42:2, Prov 19:21, Prov 20:5, Rom 8:28 & II Tim 1:9.
3) Confirm & Pilot
First, don't shortcut the time and investment in step 1 and 2, Depending on how much busy-ness and noise is in your life and how effectively you can withdraw from it to a quiet peaceful place, the first two steps may take awhile. Assuming you can easily get to a quiet place, I'd plan for AT LEAST 2-3 sessions for each step. These individual sessions might be 1-2 hours long, maybe shorter. Have a pen, paper & Bible near by. Take good notes, draw pictures, dream, etc. These may by helpful in Step 3.
So in Step 1 & 2 you've talked, brainstormed and confirmed with yourself, God (The Word) and possibly a trusted friend. Now is when we go to that trusted friend or two. I'd encourage you to set up an hour/lunch with this person and give them a heads up to what you are looking for. In fact, you might even give them some questions about you that they could answer before meeting. Then do it. Sit down with them and review, brainstorm, discuss, ask for their input, sounding board, etc. What you are looking for here is confirmation such as... "I think I'm really passionate about and good at _______. Do you see that in me? What else do you see in me?"
If you have your pilot plans (how you are going to intentionally invest and try it out), you may want to review them and use your trusted friend as a sounding board. (depending on your pilot you may also want to consult with an expert who is already doing it (see ch 7-8 of Broken Escalators))
Start doing it! After step 1, 2 and half of 3, begin your pilot (see below for info). Learn from it and live life to the fullest (which includes regular repeat visits to step 1, 2 & 3) :)
---- End of the brief summary, read on for more info, thoughts & resources ----
Notes on how pilots work: First of all, this may be a new term to some of you, so let's define it... A pilot program, also called a feasibility study or experimental trial, is a small-scale, short-term experiment that helps an organization learn how a large-scale project might work in practice. In nutshell it's trying it out. So let's say you went through steps 1-3 above and you are convinced that gardening is your passion, it's what makes you happy. Before you buy a field and a tractor, you might consider tearing up a corner of your yard and trying it. Then, after a season, you can reflect and plan for the next year. Keep in mind, that a successful pilot provides information which might lead you to decide to make a bigger garden next year OR you might decide, that's not for you and a change in direction and your real passion is photography. A note on this: Don't be the person that's trying something new every year (jack of all trades, master of none) but keep in mind that to build/invest in something meaningful you will face challenges that will require fortitude and persistence to overcome. Go back to steps 1-3 to evaluate if you are giving up too early or if you should press on.
If you want more info on pilots or a real life example (mine, which is in-process), please contact me.
Additional Resources:
If you want more info on pilots or a real life example (mine, which is in-process), please contact me.
Additional Resources:
- 5 Whys: This is a basic tool to get down to the root cause. Typically, it's used for problem solving (need to know the root cause to fix the problem and not just a symptom) but it can also be used to get to the "why" behind your passion/interest. The way it works is simple, you ask "why" five times (or until you get to the root cause. So here's a quick example:
- Gardening is my passion
- Why?
- Because I like to watch the plants grow
- Why?
- Because when they grow, I feel that I'm accomplishing something
- Why?
- Because, there are so many challenges in life, economy, politics, etc. that the garden is one place where it's just me and God free from the distractions of the world
- Why?
- Because from this place I'm reminded that I'm not in charge, God is and all I need to do is set things up and He will bring them to pass and this helps me in the rest of life.
- Start with Why - Simon Sinek - Ted Talk
- Purpose driven life LINK
- The Alchemist - Coelho
- 7 Habits of Highly Effective People - Steven Covey
